charmed, i'm sure...

As a homeschooled Christian girl, I've always felt the Proverbs 31 Woman lurking behind me. It just sort of hit me that when I was younger [okay, maybe like yesterday], I always sort of imagined her snickering as she followed me around: enjoying being everything I'm not, pointing out my shortcomings, keeping me from having any harmless foolish fun, and generally setting the bar so high I'd rather ignore her than bother to attempt any sort of imitation. I mean, come on, she's not even real! Why should I beat myself up trying to be someone I'm not?

But I've been thinking about a few things lately and my perspective is starting to shift. This alteration is brought on partly by my rereading of a Lewis essay titled The Weight of Glory and partly by my bible study on Hosea. Most of my thoughts apply to the idea of being content with less than we should, particularly in the area of relationships. And I think I'm starting to appreciate good ol' 31 just a little bit more.

We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.
[the weight of glory]

The Israelites were content to chase after an unresponsive Baal when the God of the universe was corporately pursuing them. I am content to avoid that person in the hall so I don't have to actually talk to them, to post silly things on a facebook wall rather than call and question a friend's relationship with Jesus, and to miss taking a few minutes to set my heart right in the morning so I can snooze for an extra half hour.

I'd rather ignore the call to model my life after Proverbs 31 virtue and focus on being a lovely, charming, friendly, surface dweller when it comes to relationships. I enjoy expressing myself through intellectual and creative means: ie, developing a sharp mind and artistic abilities. This of course, is a legitimate exercise when properly placed in the scope of reality. At the end of the day, I might like the attention and comments my [intentionally] charming myspace persona attracts, but it's pretty much empty.

Charming is not bad, but it must be recognized and balanced carefully. I'm beginning to realize that making mud pies at a Miss Congeniality Competition doesn't even begin to compare to enjoying authentic interactions [and besides, with this sub-zero weather in michigan, i could totally go for a holiday by the sea right now].

Real, productive relationships take time, purpose, and effort. They require occasionally uncomfortable situations, returned calls, and following up on that 'hello' in the hallway.

This post turned out to be a lot more stream-of-consciousness than I had planned. My point, however, is that being charming and funny isn't enough. Don't ever let your relationships digress or remain at that point. There is something much more rewarding. Even though I've heard it a thousand times, tonight there is new life [and a little less intimidation] in the description of Lady 31.

charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
but a woman who fears the Lord,
she shall be praised.
[prov 31:30]