Well, I know that all (2) of you are probably gloating.
'there she goes again! this blog of hers was just another 2 week fad. pay up.'
Not so fast.
What with living at Steph's for most of last week, catching up on family time, work, my grandma's visit, and finally getting the word (a whopping 15 days before classes start) that I actually DO need to put my life into a box for a move, I've been distracted.I shall eventually update you all on the many lovely happenings of JohnDavid's visit, etc.
Oh, and that 'life in a box?' I need to have it all done TOMORROW. I don't even know what I'm going to wear tomorrow, let alone what I'm going to wear for the next 4 months!
Guys, I have to tell you - now that it all comes down to it, I'm so scared to leave. I've always been the fearless one, always ready for a good time, at my house or yours. So why am I so insecure now? It seems like I just got home from a trip. I mean, there have been like, 2 days where I just wanted out of the house, but no that 'get me out of here/ready for a new adventure' spirit that I used to get. I've been waiting for it to come back, but it hasn't. I got so used to traveling, but now I just want to stay home for a while.
Why am I so afraid of leaving for... *counts* 3 1/2 months? I was on and off home for 6 months, then took my month-long road trip, so I've spent more time in other states than in Oregon this year. Wow.
I think it's just starting to sink in that I'm not really a kid anymore. I just want to be like Peter Pan - never grow up, never change...But I guess that would mean missing out on all the good things in life. One of my best friends will probably be married by this time next year. One of my other good friends will have been married a year and probably be pregnant. When will this all end?
Here are some lists I made up at work tonight.
Things I am afraid of re: school
-failing classes
-hating my roommate
-losing connections with people back home
-not connecting with people there
-running out of money
-living in a small town in michigan
-not living up to people's expectations
-greek
-saga food
-the freshman 15 (j/k)
Things I am excited about re: school
-much freedom
-challenges
-snow
-good classes
Gosh, I am such a pessimist. I really need to balance out these lists. And FAST!
In other not quite so depressing news, I need to name my computer. It's a blue and silver dell 5150. No limit on entries.
If you suggest the winning entry, you'll recieve an official...certificate of authenticity!
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5 comments:
name it "Fhqwhgads"!!
Or "The Cheat". That way it can be your nifty sidekick, who accompanies you on-a many many sneaky adventures.
Or maybe Stane. ;-)
The only problem is, for the moment, I haven't really figured out his personality. Actually, it's still even gender neutural at this point. Which is a problem for picking a name, since I can't decide if it's my girl friend or a hateful boy...It's not as cool as a Mac, but at this point, I really like it. It has a lot of power, but is on the heavy side. Such problems...
i'm so glad you posted your fears and hopes about school. it makes me feel a whole lot better about my weird list that i've got going. (my list is hypothetical at the moment... yours was actual. it was like therapy for me ;))
as for the name for your compy... that's so tough. mine's a secret. i think only 2 people outside my fam know. it's *real* cheesey and i LOVE it. :)
so... if i think of something, i'll let youknow, but you should come up w/ it by yourself so that's it's super special emilinastyle.
(btw, this is mili. i didnt feel like making a blogger name cuz i'm lazy)
holla :)
Here's something to add to your "Things I like about school" list: new peeps. Yes, it is me who's actually suggesting such a thing as "new friends" being a plus. Get over it.
Say "hi" to Penelope for me. *wink* And don't fall for the gorgeous cheating boys. Be happy with the sketched one you have, dahling.
Much love. ^.~v
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