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When was the last time you:-walked around in a cool trench coat and scarf-through a suburban neighborhood-counting minivans-and preschoolers?-then sat in a coffee shop-for five hours-reading Peretti,-studying for midterms,-calling your family [who you'll see in 22 days!],-completing Constitution homework,-listening to people talk,-designing your dream house [with fireplace, extra wide crown moulding, dark walls, and orientalesque paintings, pottery, and boxes],-and simply soaking up the atmosphere?when was the last time you -did exactly what you wanted to do-while still getting everything necessary accomplished?-and ate sushi for dinner-in Virginia?Anyone jealous of my fall break yet?[glas must really love me. he's taking me to the outlet mall tonight on the way to get garrison. georgetown tomorrow with the whole gang. pictures, pictures, pictures!]
[excerpts from the brown book]All my travel posts seem to start out, "there's something about airports..." and this one is no different....There's something about airports that just makes me want to write. I can't help it. If they would let me be a travel writer, I would do my best work in airports. Even if I wasn't going anywhere, I would have to sit in an airport to be inspired. I can picture myself a little older:I've learned to pack even lighter, live on far less, and love life more. I've got the ipod playing a mix of James Taylor and some hip new Euro underground easy listening. My trenchcoat is slung faithfully over the back of the seat and a digital ful of amazing pictures is tucked safely away in my backpack. Maybe I'm even typing this up on my adorable Powerbook; maybe I'm still scrawling in an old journal. I write about the people, mostly. Architechture, food, art, music, and history come next...his life was unrecorded; who is there to write down the lives of ordinary people?Maybe it's just the starved people-watcher inside of me. An airport always means possibility. The opportunity to see the world from a new angle and new eyes. i love all the people whom God made, but i especially know how to love the people in this place [no. 1 ladies detective agency. smith]....Looking at a sea of faces and colors, I see so many images of God. His creation reflects Him in a distorted way, yet so clearly. People are amazing. It's Thursday, so it's mostly business travelers filling this place. I wonder if I'll look like that someday: power suit and red lipstick, scrounging down fast food for breakfast, juggling a cell phone and boarding pass...I guess right now I'm perfectly content to be the vacationing college student: brownbook, ipod, red shoes, brown jacket, and boarding pass....I have a strong feeling that the sign for Life looks a lot like the sign above the moving sidewalk: please walk on the leftand stand on the rightJust call me Lefty.
Only one midterm, a principle parts test, and three classes stand between me and fall break. I'm a girl anxious to get started on that mission of...relaxation [course, two more midterms follow directly behind, so we'll see how far that actually lasts].
Anything you want me to pick up from our national power's residence? Sorry, no, I don't think I'm going to risk those "W" towels.
In other news, I hereby declare this break as a time for reform. Not that stress isn't a legitimate reason for relaxing my language standards, but it's also not a good option for my general well-being. So, I'm cleaning up. [some] Not because language = hellbound, but just to prove to myself that a lady doesn't need to speak some things.
I'd also like to get a cure for all those other bad habits I've picked up lately: homework, late nights, napping too long, frowns, midterms, crying excessively, stress, skipping meals, being anti-social, only blogging to complain, not reading cool books, lack of photography, homesickness, being paranoid, worrying, complaining more, hilighting instead of underlining...
You know. All the really horrible vices.
I'll come back from Washington DC [sunday] a new woman [with pictures].
Where would we be without country music? I'm sure that some of you disagree, but let me tell you uninformed bigots that this world would be in a very bad emotional state without it.
Happy? Sad? In love? Angry? Partying? Dreaming? Contemplative? Apologetic? Dumped? Motherly? Daddy's girl? Crazy? Patriotic? Married? Single? Traveling? Rebellious? Homesick? Lovesick? Jealous? Tractor? Have we got a tune for you...
When someone else is being dramatic, it's much easier to be reasonable in your own feelings. Sure, certain songs inspire an increase in those emotions, but I personally think that identifying with a cheesy song also brings a little joy to an otherwise depressing situation. If you recognize the cheese, it makes it more fun and less stressful. And a good ol' ridiculous song makes all the amazing things in life seem just a little bit sweeter.
You can pretty much apply anything to something in your life. And making those crazy connections is a lot of fun.
[And maybe make a few song suggestions for all you haters. you won't last long]
...
i definitely made a new mix over the last couple of days: call it catharsis.
letters never sent - sean watkins
bring on the rain - jo dee messina
cry - faith hill
remember me - tim mcgraw
it's my time - martina mcbride
beaches of cheyenne - garth brooks
i'm moving on - rascal flatts
if i were you - kasey chambers
somebody more like you - nickel creek
best of luck - nickel creek
reasons why - nickel creek
goodbye is all we have - alison krauss
crazy as me - alison krauss
how's the world treating you - alison krauss/james taylor
cold cold heart - norah jones
whiskey lullaby - brad paisley/alison krauss
i don't have to live this way - alison krauss
if i didn't know any better - alison krauss
i'll think of you that way - carolyn dawn johnson
don't tell me - madonna [i know, i know. massive public shame]
cold day in july - dixie chicks
not a day goes by - lonestar
stand beside me - jo dee messina
the dance - garth brooks
these songs are dramatic so i don't have to be.
love love to all.
It's been a busy week. They tell me I have been brave, but I don't feel brave. I feel like I want to curl up under my down comforter and cry for about a week. It's good though. I know I am in exactly the right place. That's what bravery is really about, I think. It's been a lot of change for one week, though.
In order by days of the week, here are a few of the things which happened:
-broke my french press coffee maker. cut my hand, too. will i break out the old disgusting drip method? or will this be a hot chocolate year? will i scorn hot beverages despite the already below freezing day temperatures? stay tuned. reguardless, i think i need to go buy some whipped cream.
-i made the call. and took a large step towards a possibility. it has been growing in my heart for a while, but various conversations brought about action. finally. "God cannot direct your steps if you're not moving, Meem." i made several calls, actually. isn't it nice to know that there's always a space for you at home, no matter how small? [reminds me of 'horton hears a who.' 'a person's a person, no matter how small...'] application was mailed wednesday. transcripts were mailed on friday. it's out of my hands now. i just want a clear path. my heart is in Portland; it's time to reunite it with the rest of me. two years is a good time of learning, but a long time to be without your whole heart.
-spent lots of time with my little e. i need to have more early mornings with her.
-took a nap outside in the grass, wrapped in a fleece blanket. i could feel the sunshine and the wind through it, but it was the perfect temperature. hannah read the fairy queen outloud and lulled amy and i to sleep.
-i cut my bangs short again. and the rest of friday evening was great. see previous post for many antics.
-trin cut my hair shorter and turned it into a gorgeous auburn [though the emphasis is on the brown rather than the burn. and it'll fade by thanksgiving]. during the course of the beautification, so many of my decisions were affirmed and encouraged. kindred spirits are amazing. and i'll bring her back with me to portland someday, so she can fall in love.
-made a mutual important status decision. but very much not in the way i expected. it's a lot harder to be bitter this way, which is a good thing. mutual sadness, but no hard feelings. it's nice to have things settled, but it will take a lot of adjustment and growth on my part. then again, isn't that suppose to be the point of everything we do? crying yes, regrets no. hoorah for great friends. it's nice to have another one of those. it will be strange and most people probably won't understand. i'm even unsure on how this will work. i want it back more than ever, but at a later time. it's good, very good.
Sometimes people are brave naturally. Sometimes they're forced into situations where bravery is required. I'm not sure which kind of person I am...
But I know what I want to be.
If I were to wish for something,
I would wish not for wealth or power
but for the passion of possibility,
for the eye, eternally young, eternally ardent,
that sees possibility everywhere
[kierkegaard]
"You are then resolved to have him?"
"I have said no such thing. I am only resolved to act in that manner, which will, in my own opinion, constitute my happiness, without reference to you, or to any person so wholly unconnected with me."
pride and prejudice
Same interior. Updated exterior.
emily and hannah
And my life as an emo skater chick.
'maybe you're more punk than you thought!' - trin
While you're waiting for the new Narnia themed rant post, play with a freaking cool map! Complete with pictures and music. Oh, yeah.
There's a time for sadness, yet there is also a time for rejoicing. And last night was definitely a night of rejoicing and good times.
This has been such a excellent week. I was only submerged in homesickness once - yesterday afternoon - but I was surrounded with such amazing people and silly antics that I survived. The decisions being made are hard, but I feel an amazing peace so far. Lord, lead me to a clear and obvious path.
After Bible study, I had an impromptu interpretive dance party in my room. Those are always pretty great. I think I'm getting really good because of ballet, too [oooooor not]. My Little [emily breiner, my clone and gorgeous amazing friend] and I had dinner with a bunch of crazy people. Friday night dinners are always scrounged from the depths of Saga's worst, but when you're with good people, food is fun! We ended up sitting at the table and talking and throwing carrots for a good hour after the scrounging ceased.
Kathryn Williams looks almost exactly like my sister Hannah. She even acts like her, too [cute and innocent looking, but really mischievous]. Since I don't have a cute picture of K, I will just post one of her Portland twin.
I love Freshmen like K and e, they make me feel like a big sis again. It's a really important feeling.
The three of us danced over to the library, [which was naturally empty on a Friday evening] and provided some much needed entertainment for the poor working-on-a-friday librarians. We sat on the counters, played hangman, ran around and jumped out at each other from behind shelves, checked out massive amounts of dvds by ourselves, ['oooh, can i scan that?'] and were generally loud and hilarious.
On a sudden wind of passion [as opposed to the steady drone of reason...thanks dr schlueter], we were drawn to a practice room in Howard, where K produced tones of glory from the piano and E produced...noise from her vocal chords. I heart Norah Jones music and old big band era songs.
It don't mean a thing if it ain't got that swing.
Meanwhile, back in 202...while putting in a dvd, I noticed that 12 year old kids were playing on Jeopardy. Did you know that it's a lot more fun to watch when you actually know most of the answers? I was appalled at their basic lack of American Government knowledge ['your mom goes to teenpact], but other than that they were cute. I totally could have won, though.
I watched Bend it Like Beckham with em [she's little e. i'm big E, in case you haven't noticed already] and Amber while Turing our skin and lips to satin [thanks to mary kay]. After it was over, I purchased the soundtrack. Indian dance parties coming soon!
Hannah and I then got dolled up [i was such a bum all week] and, complete with newly shorn bangs, headed up to IV Coffeehouse. We skipped back home under the stars and finished off the night with some Blue Bunny and the Marx Brothers. I'm glad that Hannah laughs outloud at movies.
The trees are finally catching on fire. Hillsdale really is lovely in the fall.
['...and two hard boiled eggs']
Life is all at once so difficult and wonderful. So fragile and at the same time so strong. It's so quickly wasted or ended, yet some days still seem to drag on.
Lord, teach me to count the days
teach me to make the days count
Baby Faith Felicity's short story has not ended. It began yesterday; it will continue to be told so that generations may understand His wonderous love.
this is my story, this is my song
praising my savior all the day long
Please pray for Kimmy and Joel Harris, the Harris and Paul families, and our church family. Take a moment to praise your Savior, wherever you're sitting right now. Notice a breath, a laugh, a tear. This is real.
[i just want to go home. has He called me so far away so i can appreciate them more? will He ever call me back?]
*deep breath*
Further up and deeper in, my friends.
Pay attention, kids. This could save your life someday.
I think maybe this boy should be a teacher. I know you want him to teach your children someday.
Names have not been changed to protect...anyone.
Jonathan M, 26.9.05
Once upon a time a long time ago (well, I guess it wasn't that long ago it was tomorrow actually.) There was a Cake-man who lived on Drury Lane next to the Muffin Man.
Anyway, the cake-man was eating cake in his little cake-shop when in walked a customer, "I wanna buy a cake," said the creature in a high pitched voice. "What kind of cake do you want?" said the cake-man. "I don't know," said the gnome.
"We have chocolate cakes, ice-cream cakes, strawberry cakes, lemon cakes, wedding cakes, rice cakes, sour cakes, sweet cakes, seed cakes, pancakes, delicious cakes, yucky cakes, carrot cakes, pink cakes, black cakes, white cakes, blue cakes, yellow cakes, green cakes, orange cakes, lime cakes, mango cakes, Swedish cakes, German cakes, English cakes, big cakes, little cakes, fat cakes, skinny cakes, low fat cakes, high fat cakes, low carb cakes, high carb cakes, pretty cakes, ugly cakes, bland cakes, flavorful cakes, happy cakes, sad cakes, leftovercakes, apple cakes, pineapple cakes, tiny cakes, huge cakes, cakes as big as a..."
The gnome ran round and round screaming "eeeeeEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeeeEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeEEEEEEEeeeeee!" Then his head cought fire and he blew up.
And the moral of the story is never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever say "I don't know what kind of cake" to a cake-man.
the end.
They mowed the field behind McIntyre today.
Now I can look out the window and see an expanse of big light and dark green stripes. It looks so pretty that I don't even mind that they woke me up early on my only morning to sleep in...
I like patterns.
I also like this picture of Talitha and me, all dressed up for the Arabic party:
we're probably the hottest bible study leaders on campus
Hillsdale county boasts "the most popular fair on Earth." No one can tell me how they calculated this title, but somehow, it doesn't really matter. I had a great time.
We never quite made it to the rabbits or cows. Or anything besides elephant ears and tractors, actually. A very strange and wonderful series of events brought about a quite enjoyable and unexpected evening...
katie, audree, and mary
after apparently shooting herself in the foot, wendy redeemed herself with free tickets to the concert. i used my pushy northwesterner skills to get us enough for the whole group. this goes to show you that a. country music stars will do anything for coffee, b. katie will do anything for southern boys, and c. four cute girls can get anything they want if they're willing to run around like crazy and beg.
i need to go to more concerts with audree, cause she knows how to dance and yell. i believe that both of these skills are necessary for a good concert time. i really wanted to go explain that to the two young amish couples sitting a couple of rows away from us. i didn't even catch a smile. i really hope they got what they expected. it made me laugh and wish i could have taken their picture without them noticing.
clay walker, the keith urban of late nineties country. he was one of the first artists that i could sing along with during my earliest introductions to country.
two suckers for a man in a cowboy hat...actually, we were making fun of him the whole night. from our free 12th row center seats!
fun times, country style. he played a good set, brought in trick pony for 'sweet home alabama' [just for kate, i'm sure] and 'play that funky music, white boy' ["oh, did he write that song, too?" - alisa]. he also talked about kate and the coffee adventures! i have a famous friend! we all stood up and screamed, and his band waved.
alisa, katie, and joel, with some love from the fiddle player
oh, you're breakin' my heart...[okay, i'll admit it. clay walker was the first country star i had a celebrity crush on]
